Mistaken Identities!

During McD exam:

a (pointing to a prof who is invigilating): ye kaun hai
b: ye prof c hai
a (with a totally fucked expression on his face): ye C hai!?!? wtf. give up. DAYA!! mera BTP pe extension lagne wala hai

after 5 mins

b: arey ye prof c nahi ye prof d hai
a: thank god!! (heaves a sigh of relief)

a: pegu, b: dadda, c: pegu's btp (b tech project) prof

If you don't get the joke, read again. :P

Cricket Fever

IPL season is here, and everybody seems to be talking about only cricket nowadays.

a,b,c are talking in mess about cricket rules in general

a: ye batao, overthrow pe six kabhi jaa sakta hai?

b,c,d are stumped! they think and think...and then

b: haan ho sakta hai. full toss ropes ke upar gaya to six hai
c: ball agar bounce nahi hua kahi bhi tab six hai
a: nahi, six tabhi hai jab overthrow pitch ko cross karke full toss jaata hai to
b: aise kaise? kuch bhi bolega kya. hatt
a: maan le aisa ho.. (a then proceeds to give a very complicated example proving his point of how if a fielder catches the ball and the ball slips from his fingers and goes without bouncing over the ropes, then its counted as a misfield and a four is awarded and not a six)
b (thoroughly confused and desperate to prove his point): achcha ye bata. agar batsman ne maara aur fielder ne pakad liya!! tab kya hoga? four ya six? bol behenchod bol. inter iit hai to kuch bhi bolega kya!

:P

a: rishi, b: ritesh, c: me

Hotness

a, b, c are talking about the heat wave that has hit mumbai

a: abe ek kaam kar na, terrace pe jaake mere room ke upar paani daal de (a lives on the top floor), mast thanda ho jayega!

b: terrace pe jaake upar se moot dunga

c: haan koi pain nahi hai. ek kaam karte hai, niche freshies ko bolte hai line mein khade hoke susu karke terrace ke upar

b: terrace leak hone lag gaya toh :|

----

a is lying down on the bed in extreme give up state

b to a: kya hua dost? c ne abhi rape kiya kya tereko
a: yaar itni garmi mein sex kaun karega
c: seriously, not possible
b (as always, thinking of impossible/imaginary situations): abey bombay mein rahenge bina ac ke, to apna sex life zero ho jayega be
a: abhi kaunsa mast chal raha hai apna

:P

a=ankur b=me c=rocky

Birthday Blues

a: Hello?
b: Happy birthday!! :D
a: thanks!
b: wats up? how ru celebrating ur bday??

..

(5 minutes of small talk with "a" trying to talk about topics which the majority of urban India would be aware of?)

..

after 5 mins...

b: hmm..so that means u recognized me after all!
a: err...

:P

a = me
b = five people at last count yesterday

Poles Apart

During lunch today...

a: abe humko resume banana shuru karna padega..log bolte hai ki bahot time lagta hai
b: time kya lagta hai samajh mein nahi aa raha hai? 4 saal mein kuch kiya hi nahi!
c: mujhe to ye darr hai ki 1 page resume ke jagah pe adhe page ka resume submit karni padegi


During dinner the same day...

a to d: kya kiya tune lunch ke baad?
d: abe resume bana raha tha yaar
a: ho gaya kya?
d: fight maarke resume 2 page mein fit kiya...1 page resume banana to SCOPE hi hai




a - c: civil junta
d: ritesh

Primitive Needs

The below conversation has directly been copy pasted from facebook.

H's facebook stat: Lol so I'm horny who wants sex ! Jk jk lol
A: likes the status
M: .....
H: Haha what ? You didn't want to know that did you well I have needs too! Lol jk
M: but...I'm your mom!!! *weeps tramatized....
A: Check www.myparentsjoinedfacebook.com
M: HAHAHAHAHA

A: My batchmate who has done a lot more than just an internship abroad ;)
H: His accomplice in the above mentioned activities
M: H's mom.

TRUE STORY I SWEAR ON MEGAN FOX.

Swine Flu

a and b are discussing how to spend time on their short notice 4 day vacation

a: abey counter strike khelte hai infy
b: theek hai...par main sirf counter terrorist lunga hamesha
a: kyu saale
b: sirf unke paas mask hai

a: me, b: ankur


:P